Life's most meaningful moments are recognizable by their ability to disturb these constant, gentle cycles of the body. When beauty is breath-taking, when love is heart-pounding, when dread makes your blood run cold, when grief is gut-wrenching, when betrayal is heart-breaking, when disgust turns your stomach, when surprise makes your jaw drop, when true connections warm your heart, you are acknowledging your body's deep wisdom and innate ability to tell you what you feel. More and more, I am learning how important it is to take the time to listen to what my incredible, beautiful, strong, well-worn body is telling me.
Sometimes the act of listening is as simple as laying down on the floor of the dance studio each morning and feeling how my body wants to move, what needs to pop, what needs to stretch, what tensions I am still holding onto from the day before. Sometimes it requires reining in the senses that I rely on to feed me information all day long, drawing in the borders of my information field to hover just over the edges of my skin, suddenly making each breath momentuous, each heartbeat the marker of an. instant. separate. from. the. next. Sometimes tears are the trigger to remind me to listen, sometimes it is laughter... but usually questions. My head and body and soul are full of questions, and they all seem to be in constant pursuit of company.
I am in a mad, helter-skelter chase after clarity, though my current path seems to be passing through wonder, through doubt, through folly, through determination and blind faith mixed with constant reappraisal.
I am learning, slowly, to trust my heart's compass, to follow my head's vision, to rely on my gut's intuition. The palms of my hands open themselves to the world and the soles of my feet carry me through this most intricate of dances. Please, let me never forget to sit and wonder. Let me remember that most of the truest answers will breathe themselves into being if I listen patiently enough. One of the deepest forms of courage reveals itself in the willingness to face the silent, dark corners of yourself.
Let me revel in the bravery that is stillness.
Inspire. There is magic imbedded in the idea that each inhale must be followed by an exhale, each exhale by an inhale. The wheel turns continuously for all of your days, and the work is never done. So glory in each breath. in. out. Or don't -- spend the time willing yourself not to be as you are. The next breath will come anyway; you will have another chance to start anew. inhale. exhale. Inevitability can be the squasher of dreams, or it can be the infinite expanse of stars stretching themselves out all around you, murmuring "we will carry you. there is nowhere to fall where we will not catch you." The fleetingness of each breath recalls the fleetingness of each moment, the constant starting over, the never-finished-ness that infuses mortality with its vitality. Search out the beauty in that epic destruction, the devastating importance of each instant that makes gods jealous of humans. inspire. Trust in it. expire. Then try again.
